My Honey came home for lunch...his usual routine is say "Hi, Babydoll"....give me a hug and then use the bathroom and wash his hands...Well, this time he did something else...I have to tell you a little about his personality...he is very calm and soft spoken...I have watched this man be yanked all over a freeway by a trailer that wasn't loaded properly, from one side to the other...pull out of it, get out and say.."well, it just wasn't my time..." without a shiver...he is very calm and stoic in the face of danger, someone you really want around when there is a "situation"...when I first met him, he was very sensitive to being teased and was very serious...he has relaxed immensely over the years...especially living with me...I am a terrible tease and consummate prankster....he has gotten to the point where he actually recognizes my mischievous glint and usually he gives me a tight smile and walks away shaking his head...well, this day? He didn't recognize the signs... (BuuuuAAAAAH HA HA)....imagine how tickled I was...
He comes out of the bathroom...says "Honey, I don't want to seem wierd or anything but I really need you to look at this...."
I went into the bathroom and looked...nothing...To which my Honey replied "no, in the toilet, there is something wrong with me..."
I looked...well...I had been cleaning and I had dumped Comet with bleach in the toilet to bleach the rust stains out...I usually leave it in there about an hour or so before I scrub and flush it...
This is where it gets soooo good...he had peed in the Comet and stirred it all up....and it looked really white and cloudy...
In my best nurse voice...I said "OH MY GOD!"
He freaked! My calm, stoic guy just come unglued...."WHAT IS IT?"
"Honey? It looks like you have AjaxorCometitis..."
"Is it contagious?" he asked
"No...it usually goes away when you flush the toilet"...I said...I am staring at him in disbelief...big eyed...in shock....
"What IS it?" he asked totally not comprehending...
"Well...you can be infected with that when I clean and YOU don't notice" I said....
By this time he was calming down and staring at me...still no comprehension...
"What are you talking about?" he asked
"I am talking about you peeing in my Comet..."
"What is a Comet?" he asked
"It's the stuff I put in the toilet to get the rust stains out...you are not sick Honey..."
I am rolling around the kitchen laughing...and he is glaring into the toilet....and then glaring at me....
"Ajaxorcometitis?"...Hmmmm...Lisa...sometimes....YOU are the one that is sick... even in all his consternation, I couldn't stop laughing....I am thinking I am sooo funny! I laughed all day!
When he went back to work...he said "You got me..won't happen again..." and he was finally laughing too...
I blame my terrible sense of humor on growing up in Montana...it is harsh and at that time, most did not tolerate any weakness...they would tease you out of your bad mood...make fun of you til you laughed at yourself and were merciless most of the time...you grow up with a "I can do anything" attitude...
Anyone else out there identify? Do you play jokes on your kids or spouses? I would love to hear about it!
Learning to laugh at ones self is an amazing stress reliever...laughing is the best anecdote period!
LOVED your story "Just kidding Hooooonaaay!" & how you wrote it! I could invision everything!
ReplyDeleteI almost spit my coffee on the keyboard laughing! What a hoot!
Tina
Oh Tina, I am still laughing, I wish things like this could be recorded on video...it is even funnier standing there looking at his eyes bugging out! Poor guy...LOL!
ReplyDeleteHa! Yep, I grew up in a family with 6 kids. We showed no mercy. If you couldn't take teasing, then you were tortured! When I was in my early teens, we had one bathroom to share for everyone but my parents. I need to "go" but my sister was in the tub. When this happened the person in the tub would shut the shower curtain and let someone in the room. I went in and upended a whole box of alka-seltzer into the tub. She yelped wondering what I had thrown in... then they started fizzing. I thought it was funny.
ReplyDeleteDonna
THAT IS SO FUNNY! ammo for the next prank! Thanks Donna!
ReplyDeleteI am still chuckling! did you get in trouble Donna?
ReplyDeleteNo Lisa. Mom was too exhausted to fight any more. I was # 5 out of 6. We only got in real trouble for out-and-out fist fights. I think some of the biggest punishments I received were for tattling. That was a big no-no.
ReplyDeleteI'll give you another one. We were stationed in Albuquerque when I was very young. My little sister was up front, in between my parent, in the car. My older brother and I were in the backseat, fighting(as usual). Mom turned around, pointed, and said "You and you are going to get a spanking when we get home" So...we get home and she had forgotten. Abbie, my little sister, chirped "aren't they going to get spankings?" Off we go to our rooms. Jim gets the wooden spoon first and cries. Then I get the wooden spoon and cry. THEN Abbie gets the spoon for tattling and my brother and I were so happy. Life was now good.
I remember getting it for tattling! LOL! That was a huge no no for us too! I think it should still be like that, it teaches you to choose your battles carefully! I just love hearing your stories...you have made my day...
ReplyDeleteI just came across your hgtv page and followed you here. I had to laugh at your Comet story. My "Mister" came out of the bathroom one day, teeth gleaming. I immediately asked him how he got his teeth so white. He told me he used Comet. I told him he was crazy and that it can't be good for his teeth but he just shrugged me off. SIX months later I was bored and thought.... what the hell.... I'll try it.
ReplyDeleteTen minutes later I stomp downstairs asking why his teeth were so white but it didn't do a thing to mine.
It was him that was rolling around laughing.
He was totally joking when he said he used comet. He told me he had been using whitestrips. lol. That time... the joke was on me. He thought I knew.
OH Lauren! That must have been awful! Guess you had a case of Cometitis! LOL! The best thing to whiten your teeth? a jock mouth guard from Walmart sports department(follow the directions to fit it to yourself) and Plus White mouth Gel...it says 5 Minute Whitening on it...it's cheap and it is amazing! Cometitis is a terrible disease! Hee Hee!
ReplyDeleteThis is all tooooo funny!
ReplyDeleteSandi
I can so see that cause you did kind of stuff to US! haha nice!
ReplyDelete*wipes the coffee from my monitor* Came to read this from 'Corn in my Coffee_Pot' and she was right...you are a hoot! One of my favorite sayings is "If you can't laugh at yourself then I sure will!" Laughter is important for our spirits...Now I can't wait to read the rest of your blog...
ReplyDeleteBAAAAAAHAAAAA! Nadine can't wait to get to know you! Laughter is truly the best thing! I am glad you can laugh at me...cuz sometimes I am just shaking my head at myself with my face beat red!
ReplyDelete